Do you ever have one of those days where you just HATE everything about yourself? Well, I am having one of those days. First of all, I have to say, coming out of depression is hard fucking work. I always feel like I have to watch myself for any signs of incipient depression in… Continue Reading
Category Archives: Musings
The Space In-Between
I have always been a black and white kinda gal. Or, if I am going to be completely honest, I’ve always been a black and blacker kinda gal. In my world, you were friend or you were foe. You were with me or you were against me. Binary thinking? Oh, hell, yeah. I had… Continue Reading
Lady of the Evening
In another life, I would have been a concubine who had nothing to do but think of ways to sexually satisfy her master. In another life, I would have been a geisha, taught seventy-six ways to please a man without even touching him. In another life, I would have been the last wife, the one… Continue Reading
I Can’t Fucking Say That!
I had my therapist session today. We discussed many things, but the part that really stuck out for me was this. I was talking about how I was worrying over Father’s Day. I don’t want to send my father a card, but I usually do. In addition, with my mom being here, she’ll probably want… Continue Reading
She’s Coming Undone
I am slowly coming to the realization that much of what I believe about myself and my family is, well, for a lack of a better word, shit. Let me explain (what, you thought you could stop me?). My family mythos consisted of a perfect-looking family with highly-educated immigrant parents who work their asses off… Continue Reading
Or Am I Just Dreaming?
I dream. I dream a lot. I dream too much. You say there is no such thing? Au contraire, mon frere. There is. I do it. I do not like it. I would rather not dream at all. Choolie’s husband, whom I will call Kojak, is a lucid dreamer. He has been for many years.… Continue Reading
Cheap Grace*
Forgiveness is the topic of today’s entry. I wrote an earlier entry on the topic, but I want to expand on it because of something that happened at Kiki’s birthday bash last Saturday. Three women and I were standing outside smoking (standard disclaimer, I smoke when I’m with Kiki, which is maybe once a… Continue Reading
Late Night Grumblings
My idea of perfection is Alan Rickman, chocolate, pizza, and sex (though not necessarily all at the same time. That could get a bit messy). I am in a down mood; I have been since my birthday, actually. First of all, I am stoked to meet Kel, her sister, and her brood. I cannot wait… Continue Reading
Why I Blog/I Am Raw
I blog because I can. OK, that’s a flippant answer, which is what I do best–flippancy. In the beginning, I started blogging because I felt like I had a whole lot of shit to say, and I didn’t want to wear out my friends by ranting and railing at them until I turned blue in… Continue Reading
No Warrior Woman am I
Pssst. Hey, you. Come a little closer because I have a secret to tell you. I fucking hate Amy Tan. Shocking, I know, but I cannot stand the bitch. OK, OK, to be fair, that’s not exactly true. I don’t hate Amy Tan herself (partly because I don’t even know her), but I hate the… Continue Reading